It's hard to imagine that a servicemember can be there to support his soldiers, but leave his family behind without a second thought.
Sadly, that's the case in many events. Out of all the ones I interviewed, there was one that stuck out.
A soldier named, Christopher Allen Boehne, was married and had a beautiful baby boy. But, he didn't care. He left his wife. His left his beautiful son before he was a year old. And never saw them again. He never wrote. He never sent an email. He never did anything. He walked away and never looked back. The story of so many others, service related and not service related.
He has a restraining order against the mother of his son. She is not allowed to contact him at all, even regarding the most important issue of their lives. Their son.
Many questions spewed from my mouth, and as soon as I asked them, I felt horrible.
Does he even care?
Does he even want to know how his son is doing?
Does he even know what his son looks like?
Does he even know what his son is like?
Do you know where he lives?
Does his son ask about him?
And the answer, without her even saying a thing, is the answer is no. The second to last one was, yes, the answer, no. But that's because he has refused to keep in touch. The last time she had to contact him, (many years ago) was to have him sign a form for their son to continue receiving medical benefit, and even then, he threatened her with jail about the restraining order. Can you believe that? He threatened the mother of his child, just because he refused to sign a medical card for his own child? So she had to go through a lawyer. What type of "man" is that?
His son asks all the time about him. I give this woman a lot of credit. She never once bad mouthed him. All she repeats is that, "mommy and daddy couldn't live together any more." It broke my heart when the little boy, Matthew, asked, "Does daddy love me?" And all she responded with, "I'm sure he does, but you'll have to ask him." He asked, "Has he asked about me at all?" With a heavy heart, she replied, "no." To do it with such grace, and honesty, broke my heart. This little boy asked every single hard question a mother in her position knew at some say she would have to face. And she handled it with such grace. That little boy knew the painful truth.
So, about this soldier, he left without looking back, because the military was not a life for a family. Within 6 months of their divorce, he got remarried and to date, he has two sons. He's over $25k behind in child support. Why? The initial state that held the child support order, he went years without paying child support. When he moved to another state, he went without paying child support. When he moved to the next state, again, he stopped paying child support.
His family, his friends, and who ever else all believe he's a hero and a great father. A hero is someone who takes care of their child, no matter what. Not belittles and makes fun of their child's mother. Oh, and I actually laughed when I saw this, his wife posted online, "just sit back and watch at how dumb ex wives can be." Wow?! Really?!
Mr. Boehne's brother, Steve, has not once reached out. Mr. Boehne's parents, have lied, and gone behind the mother's back every chance they get. I read the court documents. I'll be honest, at first I had a hard time believing another human being could be that mean. After going through hundreds of paperwork, filed by the grandparents, I couldn't believe so-called grandparents would even do that! But they did! Week after week after week after week after, well you get the point. They even tried to force the mother to move back to Illinois. What kind of grandparents tried to force another person to do something they don't want to do? After the divorce even the grandparents stopped communicating.
Not even a birthday card. Nothing. All this family cared about was control. After they lost control, they wanted nothing to do with their grandchild.
The little boy is so talented, smart, sweet, well-mannered, and just the most adorable little boy you could ever meet. I would never say this, but Mr. Boehne staying out of his first child's life, is the best thing he could have ever of done.
This guy has never once paid half (even a penny) toward any daycare. Any extra circular activities. Has not paid a penny toward any medical. I guess it's pretty hard to pay anything toward your own child, when you walk away, and turned your back on your own family.
There is so much to this story. The fact a family can walk away, their son creates a new one, and they forget and completely disown their first grandchild, is what makes this story so sad.
Stay tuned for the rest of the details. This will tug at everyone's heart. The only thing, is I have a hard time writing it all out in one sitting without crying, myself.
Lilibeth Muscato
